Friday, August 14, 2009

In which I try to get absolution for asshatery by means of public confession.

I planned all day yesterday to go to a Writers' Group meeting last night. I'd printed out my Google directions and the host's phone number, in case I got lost. I read and made notes on all the stuff we were going to be working on. Although I worked on class prep all day in my pajamas (nothing new there), I set the alarm so I would know when to knock off to take a shower, put on my last remaining pair of publicly-acceptable pants and unknot my tangledy hair.

I'd been late for the last meeting, so I wanted to get there on time. Then too, when the meeting is at someone's house, you kinda want to be there when they expect you. I was just headed out the door when I got a call from some friends who live too far away for me to see as much as I would like.

"We're just getting off the interstate right now, headed to your house. Come go eat with us."

"Oh man! I can't," I said. "I have a meeting."

"Sure you can. Come on."

"No. They think I'm coming. And there'll be Iranian food. Stuffed grape leaves!"

"Oh, come on," they said. "Come on. We're almost there."

So I caved. I called the meeting host and made a feeble apology.

"Look, I'm really sorry, I know I don't come to meetings very often, but I usually try and let everyone know ahead of time. It's just--I only just now found out that these people are coming."

She was very gracious, considering the meeting was scheduled to start within the next fifteen minutes. I stand people up all the time; I'm nothing if not consistent. But these folks don't really know me very well. They don't know that I'm undependable. And this woman is a real grown up--she cooked food and everything. She shows up to stuff.

"I feel really bad," I said, especially after you went to all that trouble to make Iranian food and stuff grape leaves and junk."

"Oh! Well, we decided to have pulled BBQ pork instead."

"Pulled pork?" I thought. "Ooooh. I'm not really a big a fan of BBQ pork. I don't feel so bad about missing pulled pork."

"Oh, okay," she said.

And that's when I realized that I had actually said that last part out loud.

So. Probably not in the Writers' Group anymore.

image, foxtongue's flickr photostream. (Note: our hats are not this fancy.)


Sarah said...

I laughed out loud and startled my dog. Glad to know I'm not the only one who sometimes accidentally says embarrassing things out loud. A friend recently told me she admires my courage for stating my opinions and standing up for myself. I was like, ohhhh noooooo honey. I inherited from my father a congenital inability NOT to say what's on my mind, often to my detriment.

Monda said...

God, I hope someone showed last night. Did everyone cancel?

I did, but I have a better excuse. Don't worry, I'll absolve you.

SG said...

This one did give me a hearty laugh :)

zetzertzak said...

I lol'd. Out loud.

I think things out loud too. Typically, I don't feel bad about it, either.

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