When I asked Muffin Uptown if she had heard of a RipStik, she blanched, asking, "What, is that some kind of sexual euphemism?"
The RipStik is sort of like a skateboard, but without the rigid safety features of the skateboard. As far as I can tell, it is essentially a noodle on two wheels. Its main purpose, if you are an eleven year old, is to make you look cool without your front teeth.
If you are a 40-something-year-old woman, its main purpose is to land you in long term disability.
For a substantial portion of the day on Wednesday, my friend Tawana practiced balancing atop one of these RipStiks in the garage, holding on to the doorknob of the back door. I expect that sometime today she will steel herself up and let go of the doorknob and try to ride that thing down the driveway. At that precise moment, the balance of power in our relationship will irrevocably change.
Forever after, I get to be the smart one.
image, The Sharper Image Razor RZ525 RipStik Caster Board